macaroni sculpture

May 23, 2008 at 8:59 pm (Uncategorized)

I’m reading today about how Solomon built the temple according to skilled instructions God gave his father, David. He employed many people to complete this amazingly beautiful offering to God. . . and left no detail unconsidered or up to chance. All mattered; because it was for God Most High, he oversaw it with painstaking attention to detail. Everything was of the highest quality. God is God, after all! The best is the very least of what He is due. And God had provided all of the resources to Solomon in the first place; it was only proper to give it back to Him with man’s creative touches applied.

And so goes this album as well.

God wrote these songs. He gave me the inspiration with ideas I couldn’t bear to lose; He gave me the skill to write them cohesively; He opens people’s hearts to receive them clearly and like what they hear. I had the raw material for five years in my hand, wondering what to do with it to get this album built. But in God’s timing, everything fell into place.

First, the $6000 gift. That started the process of hiring the best musicians for these songs and locating the best studio. . . and everyone had to have the right heart about the messages and the Lord behind them. That was very important. Prayer started every session, and the Holy Spirit anointed us–Alex the keyboard player noted the magic that happened in that room . . . and all of us agreed. These are professionals for many years, and all believe it is some of their best work ever. What an honor to be part of that! It was also very important to me that every man and woman involved felt free to bring their own creative expression to the music without feeling hemmed in, yet my original idea for the song still had to remain the anchor, the voice in the middle. It is so; the results are amazing.

There has been no rushing, no worrying. When I ran out of money, I prayed and asked God for more and kept serving as worship leader for our church and ladies’ events. One of those events provided opportunity to ask for support from anyone who felt led to help record the album, and another $3000 came in that day!

Wow! Now we could hire more skilled musicians to add spice and flavor sounds over our already delicious foundation. Like Solomon covered the temple’s interior with cedar carved with winged creatures, palm trees and lilies (making the temple impressive to all who entered–they’d never forget their experience in God’s temple), so did the Lord allow me to gather some of the most talented people in Kansas City to play their B3 organs, Miles Davis trumpets, Irish whistles, flutes, country and classical violins, upright basses that sound just like celloes and fancy keyboards that sound like orchestras. The effect is splendor. This music hardly needs lyrics!

God even kept His hand on us when we were about to make some wrong turns. One day I had scheduled a session with a musician who couldn’t make it, so I thought that would be a great day to start re-doing the vocals. That morning I woke up crabby, flat and listless and could barely drag myself to the studio. I warned Larry about what was going on (this isn’t like me at all), and he said we could just try. We spent an hour and forty minutes on the song A Different Kind. Technically it was all right, but the spirit behind it was all wrong. We stopped and learned this lesson: the scratch vocals actually capture that magic Alex mentioned better than any other vocals ever could, so why not save money and time just using the magical ones? After we came to this, my body and soul became as right as rain. God had made His point.

Absolutely brilliant: the vocals you will hear on the album are all recorded on a Shure 58 while I’m sitting on the black leather couch in the studio with Nate, Jim and Alex, looking into the drum room at Doug. I love it. I sing better live anyway.

Other times, musicians fell through so others could come in–by God’s design. He brought every musician in Himself, for His own reasons, His own glory.

Dear God, thank you for your faithfulness! You’ve arranged a dream to come true here, and I pray it reaches many thousands, even millions of souls with Your message of hope and love for them. There’s no end to my praise of Your love, Your kindness, Your ability to do great things, Your steadfastness when I flag. Thanks for letting me play with your craft supplies. I give you this masterpiece almost ready now because I love you. . . this macaroni sculpture. . . .

P.S. we’re recording the background vocals tonight. It’s the last piece before mix down. It’s coming. . . .

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after a session with myspace

May 22, 2008 at 2:23 pm (Uncategorized)
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I often wonder what old friends from high school may think of these posts if they ever read them. LOL–They knew me when. I’m so different now, but I’m still the same old me, too. We’re all like that, aren’t we? Well, If you’re one of those old pals, let me say I love ya and hello! You’re my favorite. I promise I haven’t joined a cult or gone off the deep end, talking about dying to myself and asking Jesus to stick things in my heart in order to go to the high places and stuff. That all sounds insane! And yes, if I didn’t know what I know, I’d be raising an eyebrow, too.

But man, this morning I read the Bible’s poetry-book called Song of Songs, which is an allegorical picture of God’s Son Jesus and the people who believe and put their trust in Him. We’re devoted to Him; we’re even called His bride in the New Testament, so the lines this lady in the poem says apply to we who love Jesus. Anyway, she says, “I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me.” He says to her, “All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you. (He sees her much differently than she sees herself.) Come with me from Lebanon (her home), my bride. . . come down from your lonely, lofty heights, from your dangerous places, your lion’s dens, your mountain haunts of leopards. For you’ve stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes. . . how delightful is your love. . . how much more pleasing is your love than wine. . . .” Okay, see, this isn’t talking about religion. This is deep, satisfying relationship with someone who absolutely adores you! This is what I’m into!

Who wouldn’t leave everything behind for that? To be safe in the arms of one who’s like that, we move across the country, we leave our friends and family, we get a new job, we say hang it all–this is better than anything. Now imagine if that someone was all-powerful, all-good, all-royal–a king. We love The Princess Diaries and Pretty Woman for how they portray an ordinary girl being exalted to a love affair with someone royal. Even Lady Diana’s story captivated us until it went bad because they were real life, and they were both flawed. We want to see this kind of story all the time because we were wired to want it. We were made for more than this.

The best part: the story is true. It all points to Jesus. He was and is a real man, and He isn’t like Prince Charles at all! He is the quintessential poetry man who always does the right thing, who has nothing wrong with Him; He is the romantic man who can kick some ass too. He went about things in a totally crazy way: He let Himself be killed so He could use death to take on the devil Himself AND the root of the problem we all make for ourselves at the same time. Jesus took your wrongdoings upon Himself and hung them out to dry on a cross. Then He took them down with Him into death where they have to stay when we latch onto this gift of forgiveness He offers. Not only that, but Jesus did the impossible and rose back to life FOR REAL. No one else has ever done this. Through this, He proved His plan worked and that there IS heaven: eternal life, all good, with God. HE is the only way to get into that, because He’s the only one who’s actually paid the fee.

Plus, there IS more to life even here on this level, and knowing Him is the ticket. It’s not about being good enough or saying the right prayers or going to meetings enough or even believing the right doctrine or saying no to yourself like a nun all the time. . . it’s believing what the Bible says about Him is true, then walking that out with His help. He never intended us to make a one-time profession of faith, then go about our merry way doing what we’ve always done. He wants to BE with us. He gave His life to hang out with us. Forever.

So if that means choosing to say no to that whole bottle of wine in favor of getting to bed early so I can rise earlier to talk with Him for a while before the day carries me away, then yes! I choose that. If it means listening to Him say, “Don’t respond to that ugly comment that guy just said; give a smile instead and walk away as soon as you can, and pray for his happiness,” then heck yeah, I’m going to follow Him like that. If it means looking weird to some who just can’t get their minds around this kind of stuff, then okay. I’ll take it like a woman in love, ’cause I can’t go one day without Him. I seriously am not me unless I’m lost in Him. I’m not perfect about getting into Him, I’m having a drink once in a while, I may let a choice word slip when things don’t go my way, I’m still human, and how. But I see the better way when I read the Bible, and in the power of God’s Holy Spirit, I’m changing to follow Him more and more.

I invite you to do the same when your time is right. I hope that time is today. If you want to, just say, “God, I’ve put you aside because I never saw things this way before. I’ve got a lot of wrongdoings in my history, and I believe you’re willing to take those on for me. I believe you did die on the cross, and I believe you also rose back to life. I want that eternal life and forgiveness package you offer, please. I want to walk clean and get a bath when I mess up, and to know that once I’ve said this to you and meant it, I am born again, and you’ve got me in your hand, and you’ll never let go of me. I can never be unborn, so I won’t let myself doubt that I’m changed. I trust you to put your Holy Spirit inside of me to guide me from getting too far off the track for you to reel me back in for the rest of my life–I’m going to need that a lot. I welcome you into my heart, Jesus. Thanks for loving me when I’ve been so ignorant. Teach me how to love you back. Show me the Father’s true heart. too, please. Thanks for fixing everything.”

If you just said that and meant it, you’ve entered into a new thing. And I’m crying happy tears about it. If you’ve read this far and not said this yet, I hope you will. I hope it burns in your mind until you do, because it’s like having a baby–you have to take a major leap, but afterward you can’t bear to imagine life without it. You’ll never, ever regret it. Write me a comment if you jump so I can jump up and down with you. I love ya. You’re my favorite. Forever.

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back in the saddle

May 22, 2008 at 4:37 am (Uncategorized)
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So many days have passed since I returned from heaven on earth (New Zealand) that it seems pretty silly to try and wrap it up.  Let’s just say I’ve been back long enough to miss it.  The people: so kind to each other.  Cordiality is the norm; manners are genteel, and it rubs off, let me tell you.  Paul and I spent two weeks in the car with each other, and being nice is no small task when you’re driving on the left side for the first time around some crazy hairpin curves on mountaintops.  With the ocean down, down, down on your left side and only a few wooden posts separating you from sheer death if the driver errs. . .  And yet, when in New Zealand, you do as New Zealanders do:  “Love, would you mind keeping more to the middle.  That’s a dear.  Thanks. . .”

I loved it there.  The kids look you in the eye when they speak, and sometimes they speak to you first.  The scenery is amazing, and we kept yelling out at sheep grazing, “You are the luckiest sheep in the world!  Grass so green and views like this!!!”  The ones in the middle of the road we stopped just in time not to hit spent a full three seconds staring at our grill, then a horrified look took them over and they ran to the roadside, suprisingly quick on their feet.  Pillows running.  I wanted to kiss them all.  The people and the sheep.

I love New Zealand.  And I will live there someday.  When the time is right, we’re packing our art and blankets (the only things that really matter and make home HOME), and we’re going home.  But that won’t be for a while, I suspect.  God plans the time and places we all live, and ours is here for now, this we know.

Yet here in Kansas City it was spring, and the vibrant green and clover fields won my heart like they do every year, and I believe this is one of the most wonderful places in the world to live, too.  What can I say, I love my life!  Paul and I rave about how good God is to us all the time, and it is true.  To look at the good things–whatever is good, noble, right, pure, lovely, whatever can be admired–distinguishes a life, I’m finding.  Right now I’m reading Anne Rice’s Christ our Lord book-number-two called The Road to Cana for the second time (the first time I read it during eight hours of roller-coaster-ride turbulence on the plane ride over the Pacific).  Jesus the Sinless turned from criticism and judgment when people acted ugly by immediately focusing on the good thing He could cling onto.  I want to be like that so bad!

I want to deal with people and problems creatively–this is from Hannah Hurnard’s book The Winged Life–a thought-life-changing book that I’m also rereading. . . There’s lots of that going on right now.  I’m working with God to get back to a point I veered from a few years ago.  That’s one thing I love about God:  if you miss an on-ramp He set up for you, there’s always another one somewhere down the road.  Hopefully your mistakes have hurt bad enough that you’re desperate to make this on-ramp no matter what.  I’m there right now:  starving for more and sick enough that I may have missed the things He had for me then that I’m ready and willing to do the hard thing in order to grab them for dear life now.  Jesus–I’m ready!  Please take me to the high places!  (This is from Hannah Hurnard’s classic Hind’s Feet on High Places.  Read it.)

If it means a stick in the heart and dying to myself a million times, it’s worth it.  I don’t care how sheer the drop is to the ocean on the left.  See, I know there’s more to life, and I’m killing myself slowly if I don’t do the hard things to know it now.

Do any of you know what I’m talking about?  Do you know there’s a great thing around the corner if you’d just get up a half hour early and work out, or save the Starbucks cash for the new couch, or serve at the homeless shelter like you’ve been wanting to do for years, or finally said no to yourself for a while?

Well I’m back in the saddle again. . ./ Ridin’ the range once more/ Totin’ my old .44
Where you sleep out every night/ And the only law is right
Back in the saddle again

happy trails

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