Princesschair’s Weblog

My ‘91 Lexus just sputtered and lurched to a stop tonight…thankfully right in front of the local 7-11. My girls were with me; we’d just picked up a couple of pizzas and were about to take Olivia to a sleepover when the car said simply, “no.”

As we sat there waiting for Paul to come rescue us in the van, we watched dozens of people exiting the store with choice beverages. One caught my eye. He came out with his six pack of Heineken under his arm, and as he swung open his car door, a young man with bushy, curly brown hair called to him. In seconds, an exchange took place–a bill for a promise–and the man strode back into the store, paid for a case of Budweiser and made his way for the laughing, waiting teen.

I commented under my breath to the girls, then stepped out of the car.
“Excuse me,” I said.

The twenty-something guy turned to look at me for a couple of seconds. I nodded and walked toward him.
“Excuse me,” I repeated, now up close to his shoulder. Eye to eye, he smiled sideways at me expectantly. I smiled back.

“Did you just buy that for those dudes?”
He stared at me, unbelieving. I asked again,
“Did you just buy that–” nodding down at the beer “–for those guys?” I shut my mouth and waited as he looked down at me.
“Yeah…”
I made a gentle fist and pushed his arm with it like a teasing friend.
“That was wrong,” I said slowly, softly.

He blinked. Stared a second longer and started walking away.
“We’ve all been there,” he called back. “You’ve been there. You know you have.”
I stood where I was.  Repeated in the same tone,
“It was wrong.”
He handed the beer to the kid, who quickly got into the red SUV with his buddies and closed the door. The man turned his blond head back to me and  sang back as he walked around his car,
“You’ve been there. You know you have.  Don’t be a hypocrite, now.”
I thought for a minute, then sang back, shaking my head,
“You know it was wrong, babe.”
“Don’t be a hypocrite.”
“Babe, you know it was wrong.”

It was the most civil conversation, really.  I have no idea why I thought to call him ‘babe.’  I didn’t want to get on his case, I guess, and wanted to speak sweetly to him so he’d know I was on his side.  I loved him, loved the teen boys, loved my girls…and because of that, I knew I had to make a statement about what I was seeing, and somehow hold it all accountable with the truth.

We both got into our cars. He shouted something I couldn’t hear and drove away; I was too busy locking the doors to listen.

My girls asked lots of questions about what had just happened and had me tell the story three times. We discussed how lots of people do lots of things, and its not our place to judge them, but it’s okay to step out and say the truth.

Glory be.

I pray it made a difference. I pray it affects some future decisions.  I hope my girls remember it, and I pray it somehow gave them permission to go ahead and stand up for goodness’ sake when their time comes, ’cause in spite of how weird adrenaline feels when it’s pouring through in bucket loads, it felt good to do right.  Too often wrong is being done without anyone mentioning it…and our world is worse off because of that.

It was so out of character for me to do that, it must have been the Lord!

Noble people make noble plans,
and by noble deeds they will stand.
Isaiah 32:8

Nobility–
(American Heritage dictionary)
–a class of persons distinguished by high birth and hereditary rank, and often having wealth, power, and privilege.

Noble–1)Having high or hereditary rank in society. 2)Having or showing qualities of high moral character, as courage, generosity, or honor. 3)Excellent and admirable. 4)Grand, stately, majestic. 5)Chemically inactive or inert (i.e. any of the six gases that do not react with other substances except under certain special conditions–helium, neon, argon, krypton, xenon and radon.)

Noble–Hebrew “Chor or Chowr”
–deriving from “Charar” (which has to do with white or pure), it means the free or the noble. Translates as “free-men.” Along with the elders, these leaders governed cities. Along with the priests and rulers, they helped in the reconstruction period after Babylon had taken God’s people captive. Sometimes they seem to be just administrators, and sometimes just influential people. There was no aristocracy.

that word it derives from: “Charar”–
to burn, to glow, to be burned, to be parched, to be charred. The basic meaning is the residue which is left from burning.

“I urge you, loved ones, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy (set apart) sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.”
Romans 12:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us have grace, by which we may serve God acceptably with reverence and godly fear.
For our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-9

“He is like a refiner’s fire and like launderers soap. He will sit as a refiner and a purifier of silver; He will purify the sons of Levi (those responsible for tending to the Lord’s presence in their midst). He will purge them as gold and silver, that they may offer to the Lord an offering of righteousness.”
Malachi 3:3

“You are a chosen generation. You are a royal priesthood. You are a holy nation. You are His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” I Peter 2:9

“Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation…we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we plead with you, please be reconciled to God.”
2 Corinthians 5:18, 20

“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works; which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”
Ephesians 2:10

“He who overcomes shall be clothed in white garments, and I will not blot out his name from the Book of Life; but I will confess his name before my Father and before His angels.”
Revelation 3:5

“…and they will walk with me in white, for they are worthy.”
Revelation 3:4

“Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His bride has made herself ready. And it was granted to her to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints.”
Revelation 19:7,8

“Then one of the elders asked me, “Who are these who are arrayed in white robes, and where did they come from? …These are the ones who come out… and have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb.
Therefore they are before the throne of God, and serve Him day and night in His temple. And He who sits one the throne will dwell among them.
They shall neither hunger nor thirst anymore, the son shall not strike them, nor any heat, for the Lamb who is in the midst of the throne will shepherd them and lead them to living fountains of waters. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.”  Revelation 7:14,15

“So do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so you may prove what is good and acceptable and what is the perfect will of God.”
Romans 12:2

True nobility is born and bred according to the authority of a true blood line. As freed-men, now children of God, we have been made to be kings and priests to Him forever. We have been born again to reflect His likeness.
But that doesn’t just happen. Without fiery trials, dying to self every day, and choosing His graceful way over the world’s brilliant plans…I will miss out on my destiny: Nobility in the kingdom of the living God. Forever.

Bring on the fire! Burn away all that hinders love. Help me not react to things or people in this world, unless in special situations you arrange. Let me plead with them instead, ‘Be reunited to God! He’s awesome! Don’t miss out!’

Oh God, make noble plans through me. Do them. Every one. I want to walk with you through this world and to infinity and beyond…

January, February, March, April, May…

I don’t know about you, but I sense good things are going to happen in 2009. Not necessarily all happy things, but many good things, because I believe God works good out of everything, even suffering. Even evil, if it comes. The way I figure it, I can’t lose unless I quit trusting and obeying Him.

The best purchase I made last year was a One Year Chronological Bible–it parcels out some Scripture to read IN ORDER every day. That’ s cool for some of those books that just don’t follow a linear timeline, and it puts everything in context of the bigger story. After all, it’s all about a Wedding, when it’s all said and done…but more about that in other posts.

This morning’s reading was about Jacob, or Israel. God re-named him. See, in the Bible, names reveal a person’s nature, and Jacob’s first name, the one given to him by his parents, meant “trickster.” That foreshadowed one of the major themes of his life. (We all have at least one.) That theme shaped who he was… or maybe just revealed it. At any rate, that was not where our good God intended to leave him, for he was one of the heroes in the Story. So in a moment of crisis, all alone in the desert, his family sent on ahead so they might be safer in a volatile situation, Jacob found himself wrestling with a stranger.

All night. In the dark. Grappling with someone he could not see but surely had to beat or be beaten by… What a trip! At daybreak, this stranger spoke for the first time. “Let me go. It’s morning.” The sound of His voice resonated with something wise inside of Jacob. He understood Who he had been struggling with all along, and he desperately shot back, “No. Not letting you go until You bless me.”

See. Jacob needed a breakthrough in his life. Needed for things to go differently than they had. Knew only God could change things like that. In a really weird way, God had gotten into Jacob’s world and messed him up all night, and now Jacob felt like he could ask–like he HAD to ask–for some help.

I love God so much because He gave it in the best way. First, He asked Jacob to state his old name. Admit what he had been up to then. Say the problem out loud and own it. When Jacob did, God came through with a miracle: a new nature just for him, complete with a new name indicating what HE sees when He looks at his person.

God isn’t stuck in time, in linear mode, like us. He sees all things at once. He sees you when you were a baby, you when you were three, you when you were thirteen, thirty, sixty, ninety… and if you are in Christ, He sees you when you are a billion and three, living in heaven with Him. Right now. All at once, everything in between. The good, the bad, the ugly. All of your stages are stacked one on top of the other, and God sees them as one whole. And He loves you. That’s why how you are right now or have always been up to now doesn’t trip Him up or cause Him to be totally disappointed in you …He knows how you have or soon will choose His Son’s gift of righteousness. He knows your “good” moments, knows how you will be as you get better by His Spirit in you, and He is applauding every stride forward you are making as you work with Him. And because your true self is actually separate from the actions you express, at the core of it all, He loves you just because you’re His, the work of His hands. This is what HE sees when He looks at your person.

He saw Jacob that way, too. Jacob had been through a lot; his sins had been heaped back upon him a few times with many hardships attached. God knew. All of that had led up to this desperate, cold, sweaty moment in the desert…and in the honesty of Jacob’s confession and plea, God showed His best: His Face.

Now being reflective creatures, we tend to become like what we’re looking at. Jacob saw God as He really is…and lived as a result.

Finally looking into the face of God (instead of turning away or looking around), this man stood there and shone like a moon. Time stood still. Ah…what God had intended him to be all along….

To anchor down the truth of this moment, God spoke over him again with a new, God-given name.

God is truth. There is no lie in Him, so when He says you are something, you can take it to the bank and cash everything else in on it because it is RIGHT. THAT is what you really are. What Jacob really was was Israel, “God fights.” (Israel was and is someone God fights for and with, for their good and for His glory.)

Jacob, er, Israel, was different from then on. He still operated in his old nature from time to time and God had to remind him of his new nature to get him back on track, but God made it clear from that point on that He was especially fond of Israel. Notably, the place God directed Israel to always go back to was a place called Bethel, or House of God, which was the first place they ever met. But the wrestling spot in the desert was called PENIEL, or Face of God. I find it interesting that they are distinctly separate.

One can know God in His house and yet not know Him face to face. Joy, blessing, favor, change come when you meet Him face to face.

My point? If you need a breakthrough in your life, a change you cannot make happen by yourself, go get alone with God. Ask Him to arrange a time where you can seek His face until you’ve SEEN Him. Believe me, you will know when it happens. Be honest there; admit your nature and your need. Then listen. Hear Him speak His word over you, the truth as HE sees it. He will shine, and you may brilliantly reflect it. This is your new nature–the new you! His face is your doorway to new things. Walk into Him. Receive His blessing. Things will change. For your good and for His glory.

I love you. Happy new year.

Sorry for no posts for a while.  Been thinking of you a lot, oh You who read my blog!  Thought I’d say a little something to let you know I’m still kicking.  Here’s what’s up:

Sometimes, if you’re like me, you’ve just got to slow down.  Make the choices necessary and take it all down a notch or two so you can enjoy what you’ve been working so hard for all this time!!  I highly recommend it.  (sigh)  It feels good.

I’m realizing that only God knows all the facts of my life, and I do well to trust Him and follow His direction in the moment, or I’m sunk.  Sometimes when you’re dog tired, the very best thing you can do is take a nap.  And in this moment, after the rush of the concert and cd release, I’ve been tired.  Really tired; dog tired.  I also felt God leading me to slow down, to pare everything back, and by golly, I have.  Boy, I’ve had a great time of refreshing, just hanging out at home and taking care of my family.  Ahhh… it’s been wonderful!  I can think clearly because of it!  That’s a good thing, because in this peace, I’ve written a pretty fair song and gotten some valuable insights.  Life is changing around here, and it’s almost time to start planting for the next season.

I’m aiming for maximum harvest, so I’m conferring with the Expert.   I may look like I’m napping, but I’m really in a conference!

What do you say when a dream comes true for real?  That it was amazing, stupendous, joyfully reflective, all the words Paul just said in jest when I asked for words that described the concert?

No.  You can’t say anything, because words don’t fit.  It’s too deep to capture, like a rare and ancient fish who dwells down at the bottom, phosphorescent.  This kind of thing makes light of its own.

The instrumentation was top notch.  The players, all pros, were blessed–elated to play music with each other at such a high level.  The music was cd quality all the way.  I got to tell my stories behind the songs between numbers, so the people present now have a full understanding of the music when they listen to the cd on their own.  Many people say it was their favorite part.  We passed out apples during June Apple, which was a pleasant surprise… restless kids suddenly had something to do!  Parents were happy.  Dancers–two sisters, in fact–delivered a stunning performance during Graceful…I will never forget that.  The lights were manned by none other than my Incognito King himself, Paul Harris, and made the show a real concert, and my trusty sound man at church, the young and vibrant Joe, made everything sound perfect in the house.  About 250 people–enough to fill the middle sections of my home church–took a couple of hours out of their busy schedules to enjoy a really good, for real concert Friday night.  And when they rose to applaud at the end, I knew their gift was real, too.  I wish I could go back and let it wash over me in all its fullness–I believe it was one of my favorite moments I’ve ever lived.

I think I’m going to cry.

Thank you, God, FOR REAL.

WOW!  In only five days I will be performing the songs on a familiar stage in front of many, many people.  It’s a dream come true!  Look at the poster:

My favorite part is that the designer of this beautiful thing (and all of the cd art) was IN LABOR while we sat there in her office… she had the baby a few hours later!  What a trooper!  I love it!  Alicia Ruhl wins a major award in my book.

If it’s hard to read, let me clarify:  October 17, Friday, at 7:00pm at Lee’s Summit Community Church (1440 SW Jefferson, LS, MO 64081).  Come one, come all!  If you can’t make it….

Go to CDbaby.com and search me out.  THE CD IS FOR SALE ONLINE NOW!  It will come straight to your house and you can pay any way you want.  There’s even an mp3 download option!  Soon this link will appear all over the website, but that is in days to come.  For you vigilant ones who read this blog, you get first dibs!

I love you all!

I’m about to float off my chair.  The album is out, I have shows coming up again (how I’ve missed playing out!), and even though I’m swimming in details for the October 17th concert and cd release, I couldn’t be happier.  This is a dream come true, people.  All that practicing in the mirror is paying off…

Seriously, the strings involved here number into the thousands, and oh, how they are coming together.  Some examples:  many of the album’s session musicians (who are now my dear friends) will be joining me onstage, so the magic we felt in the studio will now be enjoyed by many people LIVE.  The stage is one that I have become quite familiar with–it’s my church home, it’s my people with whom I worship often and deeply.  They’re my carpet marks, is the same sound I’m used to hearing out there in the house, it’s my stomping ground that I’ve prayed on, anointed many times over.  The local support from businesses is blowing my mind as they are playing the music in their stores to promote the concert and selling the cds.  Favor is flowing deep and wide!

Listen, if God gives you a dream, He will perform it if you give it time and attention.  Don’t give up.  He is grand…

Case in point:  My song “Graceful” is playing here in the background.  Since I wrote the song I’ve imagined real dancers onstage with me–a little five-year-old girl during the clumsy parts, then a prima ballerina dancing behind her for the fancy parts.  This, to show what God sees when He looks at us (on two different levels)–a visual representation of his acceptance of us in Christ’s grace that the audience will never forget… Well, guess what?  (!)  The drummer and his bride run a dance company. . . so there will be dancers.  (!) (!) (!)

No one but God could coordinate that!  He gave me the idea, and He’s making it happen!  Things like that are happening all over the place!  The blessings at that show and beyond will be manifold as I keep giving it back to Him.  This is His project, and He’s delighting Himself in delighting us!

Oh, the joy of working with my Father!  He loves us so!  He is so good!  I love Him so much I could float up to Him right now….

The cds are in a huge stack in my living room!  I don’t even mind the eyesore!  ‘Tis BEAUTY to me!

They sound amazing.  They LOOK amazing.  It’s a dream come true.  You’re probably aware of the concert coming up (the info is on the front page of the website); I so hope you can all come.  If you can’t, being so far away, keep looking for the new website ways to buy.

YOU WANT THIS CD!  I am biased, but it’s true.  Objectively speaking, it’s just plain delicious.

Soon now!  Buy them up!  I’ll order more!

Lord!  Is this a dream? The album will be done next week.  Finally!  Look to listen online and buy–in two weeks, God willing…

First of all, I love that you are out there.  That you care what’s going on over here means so much to me.  I care about you, too!!!  I love your comments and drink them in like air.  Keep them coming.

Next, celebrate with me that I sent the mastered cd off to Discmakers Tuesday.  It should be arriving today, and as soon as we approve some changes to our artwork, that baby is about to MULTIPLY AND DIVIDE!  1000 copies are coming off the machines and will be available for your listening pleasure in about three weeks.

I CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU ALL TO HEAR THIS MUSIC.  We let it come together as it wanted to, bringing in various musicians along the way to satisfy a need for some sound we just felt needed to be there. . . and as a result, some of Kansas City’s finest musicians are intensely invested in this project.  Larry, the engineer/co-producer told me it’s perhaps the best thing he’s ever done.  That mirrors what some of the other musicians have said, too. . .the results are quite pleasant.  We hope you agree.

One of my favorite details is that all the main vocals are the original “scratch” vocals that I sang with the band while they recorded the core layers of the music.   That’s not typical!   (U2 records that way, though, I hear.) THIS means A Different Kind needs a special tag, like some clothing has, that says, “What may appear to be imperfections are part of the natural character of this garment, and are to be considered part of the design.”  We kept the vocals like that by design, to keep the emotion and effect of the magic that was happening in the studio during those two weekends.  We tried to re-record them on a fancy mic, but the tracks I cut on a Shure 57 beat the ones on the $20,000 mic by a longshot.  So there’s a bit of trivia, if you’re into that!

Another bit of interest:  I heard angels singing on my album.  Seriously:  sitting in the studio, I heard harmony lines that were not technically there.  I asked Larry to listen, but he couldn’t hear those extra parts at all.  His ears are way better than mine, so we listened quite a few times, then I asked for a mic (a Shure 57), and sang them aloud.  They were perfect for the songs.  Wierd!   I am telling you that I physically heard ghosts of my own voice singing higher parts–angels!  I simply translated their harmonies into sounds you all could hear.  I’ve been praying to see what’s really going on for a long time, but God let me hear them first.  By grace I heard those sounds with my own ears every time the song played.  They were there and not there.  They were between.  Cool!!!  Listen for those harmonies in I Will Remember and Believe (especially the line “for Who is inside” in the first verse.

Well, metaphysics aside, it’s a fascinating process that is finally coming to fruition, and you get to taste it soon.  I couldn’t be more pleased with what has come to be!!!  Tell all your friends to come over to the new pages we’re building on the website (look for those changes in three weeks, when the cd is ready) and buy one for themselves, because my Orders are to get this music out to as many people as I can.  God is going to speak to their hearts!  Also, if your church or city has events that needs ministry or entertainment, have them visit the site to see the media pages that will suit their need for more information and contact info.  I’d be honored to bring what I’ve been given to bless your people.

Remember:  “I’m on a mission from God.”–the Blues Brothers

(P.S.  so are you)

Love,  Lori